When Bad Seems to Continue, Continue Doing Good
Family Korogocho and the Facts of Life
Every family has a story.
Some parts are sweet. Some are painful. Some seem to come back to the family table every day like food that never finishes.
I call this Family Korogocho.
By Family Korogocho, I mean the confusion, quarrels, hurtful words, old disagreements, jealousy, misunderstandings, and wounds that can keep moving around inside a family. One problem ends today and another appears tomorrow. Sometimes the same problem travels from parents to children and from children to grandchildren.
Even death does not automatically end Family Korogocho.
A person may die, but the words that were spoken can remain. The hurt can remain. Property disagreements may remain. Memories remain. Children may continue carrying anger against one another because of something that happened many years before.
That is why we must learn another lesson: the Facts of Life.
Doing the Right Thing Also Continues
If bad can leave a legacy, good can also leave a legacy.
A person who tells the truth plants something.
A mother who forgives plants something.
A father who makes peace plants something.
A grandmother who continues praying plants something.
A child who refuses to return insult for insult plants something.
We may not see the harvest immediately, but doing the right thing does not disappear.
Even after death, people remember:
“She helped me.”
“He treated me fairly.”
“She prayed for us.”
“He told the truth when lying would have been easier.”
“She refused to divide the family.”
“She loved us.”
Those things also become family food—but good food.
You Cannot Control Everybody
One of the hardest facts of life is that you cannot force another human being to become good.
Revelation 22:11 gives a very serious picture:
«“Let the one who does wrong continue to do wrong; let the vile person continue to be vile; let the one who does right continue to do right; and let the holy person continue to be holy.”»
I understand this as a warning and also a personal call.
I cannot spend my whole life chasing somebody who has decided to continue doing wrong.
I must examine myself.
Grace, what are you going to continue doing?
Will I allow another person’s bitterness to make me bitter?
Will I allow another person’s lies to make me a liar?
Will I allow another person’s anger to remove my peace?
Will I allow Family Korogocho to decide the kind of person I become?
No.
I choose to continue doing good.
Do Not Become Tired of Good
Sometimes doing good becomes tiring, especially when the person doing wrong seems to prosper.
You forgive, and another insult comes.
You help, and somebody misunderstands you.
You speak peacefully, and another person raises their voice.
You tell the truth, and someone tells another lie.
At such a time, you may ask, “Why should I continue?”
Because the right thing is still the right thing.
Do not allow somebody else’s behavior to become the ruler of your character.
Doing good does not mean allowing people to abuse you. You may need boundaries. You may need distance. You may need wise counsel. You may need to say, “I love you, but I will not participate in this behavior.”
Peace and wisdom can walk together.
To the Person Distressed by Bad
If somebody’s behavior is distressing you today, remember this:
Their wrongdoing belongs to their choices.
Your response belongs to yours.
Do what you can to make peace. Speak truth without cruelty. Forgive without pretending that wrong is right. Seek help where help is necessary. Protect yourself where protection is necessary.
Then continue walking with Jesus Christ.
You do not have to eat Family Korogocho every day simply because somebody keeps putting it on the table.
You can serve another kind of family food:
truth,
mercy,
prayer,
wisdom,
forgiveness,
justice,
kindness,
and love.
And that food can also continue from generation to generation.
When your earthly journey is finished, may those behind you be able to say:
She continued doing good.
That is a legacy worth leaving.
Please choose to continue doing good. Amen.
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